Finally a new posting..

I started this blog in March and I thought that I would write every day to try and work through my frustrations, but every day I make an excuse not to write. I made it through mothers day without injuring any arguing children. I sometimes wonder if they can speak without whining or arguing with each other. I had a major melt down at the baseball field the other day and it made me feel like I am turning into my mother, my worst fear in life. It all started with a small little thunderstorm...in the middle of my youngest child's baseball game. This was my first experience with a thunderstorm since moving to NC. I was not aware of their power over a group of people. Let's just say that we were quickly ushered off the field and under a large wooden "covered patio". I quickly screamed for my oldest child to get under the cover NOW, this somehow made him move slower and that made me a little nervous. When he finally made it to cover I specifically said stay by my side, as this was a new scary experience for me. Next thing I know he is gone...panic sets in...what if he has gone back out in the storm and gets hurt...his dad will kill me..no, he is sitting on the ground right where I told him he couldn't be. So, as I made my way to where he was my panic wears off and I loose it. I'm sure that the whole town was enjoying the show that I put on. To make matters worse,it started pouring down rain and I had to go out in the rain to get all of the baseball gear and my chair. I know this sounds like no problem, but did I mention that I was wearing a white tank top minus a bra?! I know that the whole place had their eyes on me after I had just chewed my sweet child a new butt, so out in the downpour I went. I had never wanted to crawl in a hole and die so much as that afternoon. I can't wait for next Saturday..what kind of a show can I put on for the crowd?! Ah, when will I learn to keep my mouth shut?